A guy was meeting a friend at a restaurant, and as he walked in he noticed two pretty gals looking at him.
He heard one gal say to the other, “Nine.”
Feeling pleased with himself, he swaggered to the table and told his buddy the women had just rated him a nine out of ten.
“Sorry to burst your bubble,” said his friend, “but are 2 German exchange students from the local university!!”
#2: A father was driving his 8 year old son to school when he inadvertently made an illegal turn at some traffic lights. Realizing his mistake, he said:
“Oops, I just made an illegal turn.”
“It’s OK, Dad,” said his son. “The police car behind us did the same thing.”
#643742 - 03/13/1704:09 PMOk, here's an old but still funny one!
[Re: DLC]
Mike ZigMeister
Registered: 09/02/01
Posts: 3457
Loc: SW Illinois
Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts.
However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.
MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.
The Ornithological Behaviorist very quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger.
The scientific conclusion was that while all the lookout crows could say "Cah", none could say "Truck."
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