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You are not logged in. [Log In] AppleCentral » Forums » General Discussion » Stan's Lounge » Granny on the stand....
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#590083 - 02/09/13 06:02 PM Granny on the stand....
NucleusG4 Offline
Master•Blaster

Registered: 04/20/02
Posts: 12486
Loc: Miami, Fl.
Never ask a question if you aren't prepared for the answer.

Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached herand asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I doknow you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly,you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife,and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. Youthink you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll neveramount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was ayoungster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'The defense attorney nearly died.The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.
_________________________
http://davidbearphotography.com/



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#590090 - 02/09/13 10:41 PM Re: Granny on the stand.... [Re: NucleusG4]
yoyo52 Offline
Nothing comes of nothing.

Registered: 05/25/01
Posts: 30520
Loc: PA, USA
True dat!
_________________________
MACTECH ubi dolor ibi digitus

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#590092 - 02/09/13 10:55 PM Re: Granny on the stand.... [Re: yoyo52]
Pirate Offline
Old And In The Way

Registered: 02/21/07
Posts: 3284
Loc: Missouri
Gotta love little old grandmas

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#590095 - 02/10/13 02:14 AM Re: Granny on the stand.... [Re: NucleusG4]
Leslie Offline
Proud MacBabe. Happy everything to everybody.

Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 3603
Loc: B.C. Canada
Young children and the elderly; open, honest and forthright.
Why does that disappear in the middle years?

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#590108 - 02/10/13 12:34 PM Re: Granny on the stand.... [Re: Leslie]
NucleusG4 Offline
Master•Blaster

Registered: 04/20/02
Posts: 12486
Loc: Miami, Fl.
Originally Posted By: Leslie
Young children and the elderly; open, honest and forthright.
Why does that disappear in the middle years?


Cuz we're trying to get laid? blush crazy
_________________________
http://davidbearphotography.com/



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#590112 - 02/10/13 03:22 PM Re: Granny on the stand.... [Re: NucleusG4]
Pirate Offline
Old And In The Way

Registered: 02/21/07
Posts: 3284
Loc: Missouri
Could be...I think that the young and elderly have a certain freedom....and afterall freedom is just another word for nothing else to lose

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#590116 - 02/10/13 05:40 PM Re: Granny on the stand.... [Re: NucleusG4]
Leslie Offline
Proud MacBabe. Happy everything to everybody.

Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 3603
Loc: B.C. Canada
Forgot about that part.

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#590124 - 02/10/13 11:06 PM Re: Granny on the stand.... [Re: NucleusG4]
Stumpy1 Offline
Chris Squire Rules!

Registered: 08/11/02
Posts: 2646
Loc: Southern Lake Superior
Heheh! grin
_________________________
Stumpy
"Seek for the merit in others, even the tiniest shred. Then do the same in yourself"
-Reb Nachman

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#590165 - 02/11/13 10:55 PM Re: Granny on the stand.... [Re: NucleusG4]
DLC Offline
I invented modding!

Registered: 11/04/02
Posts: 20167
Loc: Lindale, TX (Tyler)
LOL that's a KILLER (no pun intended) !!
_________________________
David (OFI)

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