Loc: Yuba City, California
I'm concerned about this country’s recent focus on drug abuse amongst children, especially the sudden rise in prescription drug abuse.
We reap what we sew!
Parenting is where we need to focus, not on our children’s behavior! Their behavior are just manifestations of our sorted lives, so if your kids are acting up, chances are they're getting it from you. Our children are like osmotic sponges who absorb our tone, expressions, and habits.
The practice of hiding our worst behavior from our children, while celebrating ourselves as role models, is deceptive and spreads like a silent contagion that is creating the drama in our children’s lives.
It’s a disgusting habit and I submit that the practice is worse than the act itself. For example, cigarettes will kill the host, but deception can destroy the whole family.
Parents who smoke, rationalize they’re only killing themselves, and see themselves as a deterrent to smoking; as though they are taking one for the team, so you needn’t bother taking up the habit. The more destructive the habit, the greater the reason "not to follow what I do… you see?", when they discover our charade.
Does the degree of destruction rise in direct proportion to decline in our morality? If so, then some of us are ticking time bombs, right? Replace cigarettes with any of the other bad habits and then the lengths to which we will go to hide this behavior, and you have a perfect storm of destruction.
It would seem to me the lessor of two evils would be to offer to share a cigarette (substitute any behavior, really) with your children and have an honest discussion about the merits of smoking.
Chances are, at some point, you’ll hear them say, “then why don’t you quit?”, and this is a telling moment for you both. You could rationalize your behavior to put them at ease but no matter what you say, it will be superficial. It’s done, through and through. You’ve imparted a life lesson.
Will your child smoke? Will they do drugs? Will small animals of the neighborhood burn effigies of your children?
If you are a dishonest person, yes, they will do all of these things and more, the worst of which will not be the breaking of your heart.
my son who has had a drug problem and most likely still has at a small one has a girl friend with a 15 year old dauther. I am sure that the woman is still on drugs as that was about all the friends my son has had in recent years.
A few months ago after borrowing my car I found a half empty bottle of Jack Daniels. Now I don't drink much at all. In fact it is rare and I don't keep liquor in the house. but to find an open container in my car really upset me and I had a conversation with my son about it, Very cordial on my part I do say. He said it belonged to his friend. Okay, maybe or not but when he borrowed the car the woman's young daughter would have been with them.
So, just as you said, what message is this sending to this young teen. When does the expect the teen to get into drugs because that is what is going to happen if it hasn't started already which I expect it has.
Wha mom t a shame.
There are 10 kinds of people. Those that understand binary and those that don't.
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