So I take a break and spend time doing other things and thought I would come back here and share our great news about the house selling.<br><br>Of course someone, who doesn't have the balls to post as themselves, uses a name they registered and posts a totally insensitive post. <br><br>No attack was made by me or anyone else in my thread..yet this jackass decides to play sockpuppet and post something like that.<br><br>Yeah..welcome back to MacMinute. Things haven't changed. I can probably guess who it might be that posted that and I hope that Stan gets my email and does something about it. <br><br>Sure sure...I'm sure 2 or 3 people will make some post either here or in a new thread saying that I'm this and that or whatever...but the fact remains that what was posted in my thread was beyond good taste.<br><br>
I agree that the "Dusty" post is out of line. And probably perpetrated by whomever you suspect. But in fact, it's exactly the kind of crack that should be ignored. It speaks for itself in that most people will find it as repulsive and inappropriate as you do.<br><br>But to whine openly about it. Cast a blanket judgement on the forum et al, and announce that you've run to the "principal" is just plain juvenile. Ignore it, John. Rise above it. Way better than foot stomping and walking off. Again.<br><br>Just my .02.<br><br>
Right, no blanket statements. It wouldn't be fair to you, or your family, to just say "Kentucky sucks" because there happen to be some racist rednecks there. <br><br>Just ignore the jerks and trouble-makers like iRock and focus on the really cool members like me!<br><br>
Loc: Yuba City, California
How many times have you heard that the most appropriate way to deal with rude people is to ignore them and they'll go away? Yeah? Well don't hold your breath. <br><br>Those who would offer this kind of advice rationalize their behavioral response as taking the high ground, and that by not feeding into this reprehensible behavior, it will somehow diminish it's presence and the capacity to influence. Or, perhaps in a perfect world, an intelligent, quick-witted, verbal reaction to rude behavior will be so profound, these mean-spirited people will see the error of their ways and make a life-altering change to their psyche. Yeah, right, when pigs fly.<br><br>To use the playground metaphor, I was bullied by a bully for weeks. He not only enjoyed the control-by-torment, but fed off the laughs from onlookers, who did more to escalate the situation than anything I ever did.<br><br>Nothing says enough like a fat lip. <br><br>No one could have intervened on my behalf, not the administrators, my parents, or my friends. This was between him and I and if I wanted the torment to stop, I had to show him I wasn't going to be a doormat to his enjoyment any longer. So I slugged him and he retreated in shock and bleeding from the mouth, and when I stepped forward to get mine, he turned and ran and in that instant he became the goat and my popularity skyrocketed.<br><br>Sadly, schoolyard justice doesn't exist here in the forums. On the contrary, cowards who hide behind their anonymity, spewing their hate go unchecked because the moderators are ill-prepared to deal with these situations and the members are told if you ignore it, they will move on. How does that figure? What does that mean? That this depraved individual will retire the sock if no one responds to his hate? Tell that to those brutalized by the Nazi's. I say make a stand against rude and mean behavior.<br><br>Only after an overwhelming response from a consensus do the moderators even bother to step in and when they do, their response is swift and terminal. No second chances... until this pervert reappears under a new user-name and plays nice until his rage manifests itself once again and we allow it.<br><br>No, loathe to intervene, moderators who can count the number of minutes on one hand spent in these forums on any given day, have no real appreciation for the way these puss-filled aberrations resurface and fight the urge to contain themselves until they eventually succumb to their wanton desire to shít the bed.<br><br>I am not suggesting the moderators spend more time interacting with the membership, in fact the less we see of them the better, however there is probably more that could be done to preclude this offensive behavior. In fact, a zero-tolerance for mean and rude behavior is necessary in any society. But, as long as people stick their collective heads in sand these bullies will continue to thrive.<br><br>Where I come from, we know mean and rude behavior when we see it and it isn't tolerated. It's exposed for what it is. Of course this place hardly compares to my hometown but if you hang out here long enough, you can find many more similarities than differences.<br><br>Online forums can do more to reduce the propensity for some to slap on a puppet and blast away with their hateful alter-egos. I think a ban on multiple user-names issued to a single individual should be implemented. I'm not a geek, nor have I given it much thought, so I wouldn't know how that could be accomplished. Personally, I'd like to see the internet equivalent of the social security number and until something like it is adopted there will be no accountability. When you think about it, anyone who thinks they're online persona isn't a sock puppet is kidding themselves, unless of course you're like me and uses the same user-name in every forum he belongs to...<br><br>Beyond that, one has to ask one's self, what are we doing to mitigate these attacks. Responding to hate with hate or hurtful criticism won't solve this problem and only establishes an adversarial relationship with the attacker. Confronting someone who is rude in a public forum may only serve to reinforce their role as the antagonist. However, if done privately, it will enable your attacker to save face while allowing you to document your desire to defuse the situation before it escalates into a pissing contest.<br><br>We all have bad days and at times say things we regret and all too often these manifestations are symptoms of personal troubles that require introspection. If allowed however, these small personal problems can fester and take on a life of their own, to the point where we no longer own them, or have the ability to reel them in, and are branded as a malcontent. <br><br>So before that is allowed to happen we need to step in and ask, "You know, you seem to be having a bad day, is everything alright?" or "Have I done something to offend you?", but done on a personal level, and not publicly in order to defuse the situation and change the dynamic in a non-offensive way.<br><br>So to those who say ignore it, I say don't, not if you value the quality of life in these forums. It is incumbent on all of us to throw a spotlight on rude behavior and expose it for what it is. Say and do nothing and you let the frustration build to the boiling point, which always ends in alienation and we all come away with a hollow feeling that nothing was resolved and is a disservice to us all.<br><br>Peace.<br><br><br>M i c h a e l (OFI)<br><br>[color:red]"Freedom's untidy. And free people are free to commit mistakes, and to commit crimes and do bad things." — Donald Rumsfeld</font color=red>
Helluva campaign speech! But I totally disagree with you. Ignoring doesn't have anything to do with a real or implied "high road". It has to do with basic, proven child psychology. Neither brat nor bully will stay on task if they're getting no response from their audience. Maybe they'll dial up their activity at first, but still lacking a reaction, will move on.<br><br>Natcherly, it's up to each individual how they handle these types of situations. But, IMHO, any attempt to engage a tormentor in a dialog only validates their behavior and perpetuates the problem. The sudden realization that "I've been sooo bad and will now be a kinder gentler soul" is great for a TV mini-series, but in meatspace? Meh...<br><br>
wow..good post there G4dualie! I agree but the only problem is...this person is too weak to face me with his real ID. I can only guess who it may be, but rather than make a bad assumption, I would rather this person PM me and confess...but you know that's not going to happen.<br><br>I love coming to Macminute and communicating with the majority of the people here. If I hadn't ever come here, I would never got the opportunity to meet Carp! Or share a drink and dinner with Morom. Or develop a warm friendship with someone on the other side of the world (Waleed) and continue talking with him. <br><br>It's a shame that there is one or two people here who give this place a bad taste in my mouth. And moderation...heh..forget about it. Stan is too busy I guess.<br><br>G4, I want to continue discussing with you about that business we discussed other places...PM me please!<br><br>
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