News Release <br>---------------- <br>October 12, 2002 <br>---------------- <br><br>In a bold, and unprecidented move, Quark today announced its new strategy for dealing with Apple's state-of-the-art operating system, OS X. <br><br>"We're not sure exactly what to make of it," says Quark spokesman Edna DiSands, "so, we've decided to pretend that it doesn't exist." <br><br>The company announced today that their previous strategy of providing no information to customers, and being unclear about updates wasn't effective enough to quell desire for an OS X version of the program. <br><br>"We really thought this 'X' thing would just blow over," added DiSands. <br><br>As a result, the company has decided intstead to pretend that OS X and the more recent 'Jaguar' don't exist. Company officials will remove any reference to the new version of the OS from heaquarters including offending magazines that seem to have taken note of Apple's recent developments including MacWorld, MacHome, MacAddict, MacFormat, PhotoshopWorld, Print, How, Time, Newsweek, BusinessWeek, Fortune, CPU, PCWorld, Entertainment Weekly, People, and literally dozens of other publications. <br><br>Employees are to be instructed to plug their fingers in their ears and shout loudly "la la la la, I can't heaaaarrrrrr you!" whenever OS X or a native version of Quark is mentioned. <br><br>"We're content that this will solve the matter once and for all," stated DiSands.<br><br>from an outside news source - thanks, D.J.S.<br><br>
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