WOMEN'S ENGLISH:<br><br>Yes = No.<br>No = Yes.<br>Maybe = No.<br>We need = I want.<br>I'm sorry = You'll be sorry.<br>We need to talk = I need to complain.<br>Sure, go ahead = I don't want you to.<br>Do what you want = You'll pay for this later.<br>I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron!<br>Are you listening to me?? = Too late, you're dead.<br>You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me.<br>Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs.<br>You're so .... manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot.<br>Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive.<br>It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now.<br>You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?<br>I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on<br>TV.<br>How much do you love me? = I did something today that you're really not<br>going to<br>like.<br><br>MEN'S ENGLISH<br><br>I'm hungry = I'm hungry.<br>I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy.<br>I'm tired = I'm tired.<br>Nice dress = Nice cleavage!<br>I love you = Let's have sex now.<br>I'm bored = Do you want to have sex?<br>What's wrong? = I guess sex is out of the question.<br>May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.<br>Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.<br>Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you.<br>Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you.<br>Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with<br>other<br>guys.<br>You look tense, let me give you a massage = I want to have sex with you<br>within<br>the next ten minutes.<br>Let's talk = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep<br>person and<br>then I'd like to have sex with you.<br>I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay.<br><br><br><br>
<blockquote><font size=1>In reply to:</font><hr><p> guys = sex on the brain.<p><hr></blockquote><p>As the mother of an old boyfriend used to say: "the most important sex organ is your brain."<br><br>Which doesn't help explain why some guys seem to do a lot of thinking with their [insert noun of choice for that other organ.]<br><br><br>
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