#150845 - 03/23/0412:48 AMRelationship Post II: I'm not paying for dinner
My second relationship post, don't read if it offends or you take it too seriously like some people with the last one.<br><br>A few weeks ago a girl in a messed-up relationship (they've been together for over a year, but they don't call themselves boyfriend/girlfriend for who knows what reasons, not normal situation by any standards) was trying to lecture me on relationships. She tried playing cupid, asking me to ask out a mutual friend of ours, and buy the girl dinner. I cringed. I told the girl, I don't mind buying a woman dinner, as long as the 19th amendment is repealed (I believe this is the amendment that allows women the right to vote, I'm not sure).<br><br>My point is, in our modern society, I view a woman as an equal, and it is a turn off that I would have to pay for dinner, movies, and basically everything. I don't mind covering for a friend, but my friends don't expect me to shell for them every time, and they cover me also. A woman that can't manage her own finances, and depends on a "knight in shinning armor" is no-woman for me. She called me a nut-case, making it look like I'm some sorta weirdo for this view since that's what she expects from a man. I immediatly pointed out a mutual friend of ours with the same views when it comes to dating, and she called him a nutcase also (by the way, he's a Republican also, concidience ?). <br><br>Oh well, I said that my friend and I believe in a fair-and-balanced relationship, not being "whipped" (I didn't actually use the term whipped). What I didn't say, but observed is that my Republican friend's fiancee might have him whipped by say 60/40, but that's okay, since all relationships will have the female more in control. In their relationship, they discuss which movies to see, what things to do, never put each other down (atleast in public) and share costs of movies, dinner, etc. The girl who called me a wacko, she controls her guy 90/10. Her man has to see the most feminine movies, or else, and she won't come and see any of his movies (she personally made him watch one of the girliest movies, while a bunch of us where out, the guys saw Pool Hall Junkies). He has to nurture her everyday while she makes fun of him in public, and when she is sick, he has to be with her the entire time, giving her full attention. She constantly talks about "hot" guys, while if he says something about a girl...<br><br>I once said to him, the GOP friend, and a fourth guy that all guys are whipped in the end. Ironically, the guy who was whipped the most, him, was the only one who disagreed ;-).<br><br> Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country .
a relationship is not about who pays what. if you are thinking about how much money you're spending on a girl, than that relationship is not worth keeping. i always payed for my girlfriends and i never ever thought about sharing. some girls insisted to share, i didn't mind. it's not important who pays! i also pay for my friends and next time they pay for me. it's not an issue. it shouldn't be for you either. a relationship should be much more than who pays for whom. i feel sorry for you.<br><br>as for movies, if your friends have problems over choosing what movie to see, than all i can say is that your friends are morons. the girl you were talking about is right.<br><br>
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#150847 - 03/23/0401:18 AMRe: Relationship Post II: I'm not paying for dinner
I knew I was right about putting a disclaimer about taking this thread too seriously, unfortunately, I knew I was right that there was no point also .<br><br>You believe in your type of relationship, I believe in mine. There are girls who will happily follow your way, and girls who will happily follow mine. Choice and diversity are great things. It is really immature of you to say "I feel sorry for you." In many ways, I should feel sorry for you to respond so harshly to an innocent post.<br><br>It isn't about the money for people that see a relationship like me, its about responsibility. Shared responsibility, and my ex even though coming from a different financial background than me, realized this, rarely letting me pay for her. As for my friends, I SPECIFICALLY said I shell for them, and they cover me. Please read the entire post next time.<br><br>Also concerning my friends, I didn't know some of the people who have/are going to UCLA are morons (low on emotional intelligence, relationship backbone,. maybe, morons, definately no). I specifically mentioned one guy, and his reasons for going to some movies, he is whipped! I guess your part of town doesn't have whipped men. <br><br>Sheesh, man, that was very impolite post iraszl. I welcome posts that disagree with my original thesis, and people who disagree with me passionately, let's just try to keep the civil tone of the original post.<br><br> Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country .
sorry if it was too harsh, but i think you got the point and that what matters. <br><br>i don't think i'm immature to feel sorry for you. you wanted to know what people think about this issue and i expressed my opinion and feelings. if that's too much for you, you should've put a disclaimer: please only post rational and emotionless posts. that would probably work for you.<br><br>if you think that only rational messages are exceptable in an argument, why did you evaluate my message from a personal point of view? ooops, that's a rhetorical mistake.<br><br>i think you like arguing. you post controversial issues, so that you can defend your side in front of an audience. it's a great sport, in the ancient Greek times they had championships.<br><br>
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I missed the first one..so don't know what went on there.<br><br>but here is my take with this one:<br>If you aren't serious, then why post this? Is that not something you believe in or are you just posting something to stir up things? <br><br>As for the story you posted, I just shake my head and think that you are out there. I don't have time to make a full response, yet. I have to get to work. But let me just ask....why the reference to "GOP", "Republican" etc in your post? WHO CARES?? Again, I'm a republican, but do you see me mentioning it other than in response to YOUR posts?? <br><br>How old are you? And how many dates have you been on? Something tells me that you are young (mid-20's and younger, not that there's anything wrong with that!) and that you haven't dated much. Be a man. Buy a girl a dinner. Stop with all this "if you repeal the 19th amendment" and "I want my women barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen if I have to pay" attitude.<br><br>But that's just my take on it.<br><br>
#150852 - 03/23/0403:40 AMRe: Relationship Post II: I'm not paying for dinne
Before you all go nuts on me, realized the post used exagerations to make a point, that the burdens of a relationship should be shared. Also, the events described were much less blatant in real life, and probably seem harsher on the internet. Please reread how girl #1 treats her "boyfriend" compared to the second couple.<br><br>Also, I'm not going to say "lady, pay for your own bill" to a girl. The point of the post is that I don't believe in 90/10 relationships like the first guy, but believe in 60/40 relationships like the GOP friend. Why did I use the term Republican/GOP? Partially as self-humor of Republican cheapness, and more importantly to make the story easy to follow, so you can distinct the guy in the bad relationship with the second friend. To be honest, both men are Republican, and their political party although irrelevant, it made the story much easier to follow than just saying "this guy, this other guy." <br><br>The 19th amendment comment was a perfectly timed joke, picked it up from the GOP friend, although he used it in a different context. The "barefoot and pregnant" comment you make about me is contrary to my entire post, that supports women empowerement, instead of Operahfication.<br><br>I am attracted to emotionally mature women, who are independent minded. They are feminine, but its a non-Dr. Phil side of feminity that is at the same time beautiful and strong. You have your own tastes, don't attack me for mine ;-).<br><br> Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country . <br><br>PS:<br>You make it seem like I force you to say your a Republican in your replies to my posts. <br><br>PPS:<br>Age: "mid 20s" <br>Experience: I'm not the GQ-man, but I've had success with beautiful women, and failure with average looking ones. Beautiful women were always accidental successes, me having a "whatever" attitude towards them initially, which led to mutual interest. With average looking girls too much attention and giveaway early on finished thigns before they could catch on. My last girlfriend was literally a model, atleast when she was still in her teens, but she still looked like one during the relationship. I don't like "bragging" so just assume me a nerd. Rather be assumed a nerd, then appear a bragger. Anyways... through these experiences and the observations of other relationships combined with a touch of economics and marketing, I came up with my "theory" on how to deal with beautiful women, which was the thesis of my last relationship post.
Loc: Alpharetta, GA
Early on, when my wife and I were dating, she started paying for every other date and I never asked her to do it. She just realized I wasn't making a load of money and it wasn't fair to expect me to ante up every time. Hmmmmm, she's a Republican too. Hmmmmm.<br><br>
Loc: Louisville, Ky
"if you are thinking about how much money you're spending on a girl, than that relationship is not worth keeping"<br>Sorry, but I have to agree with iraszl on this statement. I'm not saying that you can't have the 60/40 relationship you want, but if all you start out thinking is about money...well it probably won't get you anywhere. Relax and have fun! And I didn't read anything about love. Don't you want to find someone that you love? My feelings are you've never been in love. When that happens my friend, money is no object!!!<br><br>
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