Originally Posted By: Anonymous
Because I am my own man:<br>-- I never lock my keys in the car, but when I see someone with this problem I produce my trusty packing ribbon and never ask for a wire clothes hanger.<br>-- when the car isn't running very well, I will first listen to the engine and try to ascertain what kind of problems the motor may have from the various differences in sound from a normal running engine and make my decisions as to which operational sections of the engine bay I will examine more closely or attempt to repair and often will not bother to lift the bonnet (as we call them here), Since I know my limitations. I will say something to the effect = “she is cooked, we will need a new motor, lock her up and let’s flag a lift to the nearest repairer”.<br>-- when I catch a cold, I usually disappear to lick my own wounds but if someone brings me soup and generally takes care of me, I am always most thankful. I also will help anyone in need whether they have helped me previously or not.<br>--I can be relied upon to do all the grocery shopping as well as shop for all the home maintenance and gardeningrequirements . I can be expected to look for exotic items not normally included in basic groceries as I am an inventive and talented cook. I have no qualms about standing in the queue at the checkout and thae assistant holds up the item and asks the floor manager in a loud voice to get a price on a 24 pack of pads or tampons.<br>--when one of our appliances stops working I will insist on taking it apart, to locate the damaged part and pick up a new part while in town that day in order to be able to replace it promptly and save on the callout fees.<br>--I very rarely watch TV since the Television companies seem to think we are all morons who want to sit and watch crap inbetween the main program of poor taste commercials for inferior products. I usually read the guide and select the programs I want to watch (from a non-commercial station)and either arrange my time accordingly or preset the video to record anything I consider important enough to waste time and money on taping.<br>-- I know that you did not read the map properly and think that if we continue this way then we will be lost. So I am going to stop and ask that person, to see if I am correct. No it does not matter that he is drunk, at least he is going to know his way around here better than you do.<br>--there is no need to ask me what I'm thinking about, especially while driving quietly. You already know that I am deaf in that ear and cannot hear and thus it is going to be safer if you leave me alone to concentrate on my driving or drink in the beauty of the Flora and Fauna on the side of the road.<br>--you don't have to ask me if I liked the movie. Chances are, if you're crying at the end of it, I would normally have already elected not to come if it was one of those movies and thus am not there to be asked. BUT... if I was there too and it was a heart wrencher chances are I would be crying too.<br>--I think what you're wearing is fine but I thought what you were wearing five minutes ago was sexier than this. Either pair of shoes is fine, but since we are going to a dinner dance,.. don’t you think the flatter shoes would be more comfortable?. Looks better without the belt as it allows your body to fill the clothes naturally. Your hair is beautiful. You look great lets go!.<br>--and this is, after all, the 2000's, I will do all the housework. You just do the ironing of your own work clothes and go to work. I'll do all the rest. <br>•• by the way what do you want for dinner? kiss have a good day.<br><br>

Because I'm a man, I became bored about a quarter of the way through your essay. crazy

If we don't count our blessings
We are just wasting our time