I'm working hard to find one, but it's not going well. I've been trying to sync via a Palm, which is at least in theory compatible with both NUD and iCal, and the initial sync worked well, but subsequent syncs end up with iCal not knowing what to do with changed events, and not displaying them properly.
I'm (frankly) getting a bit desperate - my calendar is a critical tool, and as the owner of a mid-size small business, I use it for both family and office scheduling, with my wife and staff all on the server. I can't really just go without access to NUD, but it's going to be a darn shame if this is the thing which keeps me from getting an iPhone.
Everything else, including Now Contacts, there's a functional workaround for - contacts don't change so rapidly, so a once-a-week import/export will work fine, and NC and address book both support a reasonable import/export scheme.
Of all the 1000 things I do with my computer and Treo, the ONLY thing that I haven't been able to make work (directly or via workaround) for iPhone is NUD.
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