#229929 - 05/19/0512:15 AMEpisode III: Just saw it!
I'm tired and it's 3am and I have to be awake in 3.5 hours, so this'll be choppy. Plus I'm still dizzy from the odor of the Napoleon Dynamite look-alike I had to sit next to in the theater. And fat jedi geeks hitting each other with plastic lightsabers.<br><br>This movie is mind-numblingly dense with objects. You are bombarded with CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI on top of CGI. And then, just when you think you're seeing real people.... CGI!!!!<br><br>I just sat through two hours of ILM's resume. We get it... they can do CGI... STOP ALREADY! This movie actually made me HATE computer graphics. (I'm punching my Finding Nemo DVD right now!) It was so tiring. Example: They have the real guy's head for the Clone Trooper when he's without helmet... but it's on a CGI body! WTF??? And if there's one thing ILM still can't do, it's making a CGI human walk/stand/shift weight like a human. They just can't do it. So put the dude in a suit and film it... when has this become a non-option??<br><br>Yoda's a badass. The Emperor dude is awesome (though when his face goes ugly he looks like Dan Aykroyd did in "Nothing But Trouble"). Everyone else was... well, they showed up for work at least. <br><br>Wilhelm scream: present. Millennium Falcon-type ship: present. Heck, the same medical droid that gave Luke a new arm put Darth Vader together! Small universe, huh!?? And the Lucas-esque scene transition wipes were there, but most were really wacky. Anakin turned too quickly to the dark side. And did we ever think we'd see a chick with her legs up on a table giving birth in a Star Wars flick?? I mean, really!!??! <br><br>2 stars out of 4. Episode order of greatness (best to worst): IV, V, VI, III, II, I<br>(I used to think Empire was best, but I had to revert to A New Hope as the top spot.) Yes, the one with the Ewoks even beat this final installment.<br>
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