On the first day God created the cow. God said,<br>"You must go to the field with the farmer all day<br>long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give<br>milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life<br>span of sixty years."<br>The cow said, "That's a kind of a tough life you want<br>me to live for sixty years. Let me have twenty years<br>and I'll give back the other forty."<br>And God agreed.<br>On the second day, God created the dog. God said,<br>"Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at<br>anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you<br>a life span of twenty years. "The dog said,<br>"That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years<br>and I'll give back the other ten."<br>So God agreed (sigh).<br>On the third day God created the monkey. God said,<br>"Entertain people, do monkey tricks, make them laugh.<br>I'll give you a twenty year life span." The Monkey said,<br>"How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't<br>think so. The Dog gave you back ten, so that's what<br>I'll do too, okay?"<br>And God agreed again.<br>On the fourth day God created man. God said,<br>"Eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy. Do nothing,<br>just enjoy, enjoy. I'll give you twenty years.<br>"Man said, "What? Only twenty years? No way.<br>Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and the<br>forty cow gave back, and the ten dog gave back and<br>the ten monkey gave back. That makes eighty.<br>"Okay," said God. "You've got a deal."<br>So that is why for the first twenty years we eat,<br>sleep, play, have sex, enjoy, and do nothing;<br>for the next forty years we slave in the sun to<br>support our family; for the next ten years we do<br>monkey tricks to entertain our grandchildren; and<br>for the last ten years we sit in front of the house<br>and bark at everybody.<br><br>Life has now been explained<br><br>__________________<br><br>